by asblackaspossiblecollective
Tarven
DO YOU KNOW LADIN?
“Do you know him?”
“Exe ntwana, check, notice that people asking about Ladin never know-ed him?”
“Did he fuck you cuteface?”
(laughter erupts)
“He’s a bitter one-night-stand this one!”
(An explosion of laughter!)
“My man, everyone know Ladin, even yo’ mama!”
(‘more laughter!)
“like life know death. He is the only man ever to see Godfather cry, the tot-tot Kingpin, gcwala! (they shout “gcwala” together)
Outchea, asking us: he he, do you cava Ladin? He he! Fuck off marn. Let me tell god-truth about ladin: you hate skinny motherfuckers? Then don’t die, coz Ladin will show up in yo’ mama house, tell yo’ mama, that yo’ ass is dead!
“Let me, Let me break it down for you homeboy. Festly, fill up the table, two-beers. Two, Ladin is a special son; you see, Angels done fuck each other, did some nasty shit, sent us that boy, because god punished his nasty angelic parents that their son will carry, one, the burden of knowing when and how we are all going to die, and two, come to every house and be the first to break the news.”
“Uhhhhh, cold!”
“That some holy gift there homeboy. We appreciate Ladin”
“So Godfather, gcwala!, never cries. Takes orders from God and decides who must die when death cant kill no man, because death cant go hungry my guy”
“No let me break it down for you homeboy, this one will feed you a lot of nothing. Godfather, gcwala!, ate his son. Didn’t know shit. The nanny, nasty ass bitch, Godfather, gcwala! Bangs her, bangs her mama, papa, her son too. A beast of many tastes the Godfather. Her, she cooks Godfather’s newly born infant from his baby mama, baby mama gives him a son even. Turns him, little Godfather seed, into a tasty stew, dig? chopped the little thing, grated him, marinated him,. She watched him Godfather, gcwala!, with baby mama, eat they son. Bam!”
“I knew he’d get excited over irrelevant details this one. Excuse him homeboy, he my retarded step-brother. Very gossipy. Now Ladin? You came here, fro the other side of the bridge right, ask us who Ladin is? Ladin is the kid that went to Kingpin, and broke it down for him: yo’ son is dead, you ate him. She cooked him. End of story. Now you can grieve. Bam!”
Outside Church
WHO IS LADIN AND WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT HIM?
“Oh Christ’s cousin! Oh that boy! Have you seen him? Have’nt seen him in years. Thing is, Death gave us a break us back home, and I struggle to walk my son, so I don’t see ladin no more, like death! Haaaaaa, you see what I did there?”
“My friend here, good old friend, is going to die soon, and we will await Ladin to bless us with the news of her departure from this god-forsaken-dump. I want to end myself but Ladin doesn’t bring the news when you take your own life. Him says, it is then your duty, and yours alone, to tell your people that you are dead.”
“So we all wait for that pure thing called Ladin. He’s the only creature worth saving when god burns this place.
“So, all of you listen. So my cousin killed the Bishop’s son. But someone had to pay, you see, its how things are, so my cousin had a son, Said, so the family offered him to be killed by Bishop in the veld. Ladin, oh that beautiful boy, had seen it all. After Said gasp his last breath, ladin graciously walked that door, with his assistant, and we knew everything had been corrected. He looked so sad. Told us he had never seen a young boy so selfless as Said.”
“Young man, lets leave you. The lord is burning this place in a few moons. Don’t be here.”
“God bless you son. You friends with Ladin nhe? Say Hi for me.”
“At the announcememt of Said’s death, ladies, listen, he said I’ll make a stunningly beautiful corpse!”
“Ahhh, what a charmer. Good hearted too, fatherless thing.”
Home
YOU ARE HIS SISTER?
“The only family he ever heard. My name is Notayi. I was 8 when he was born. Grew up too quick. These evil people here said he had a gift, somehow.
“This is where he sleep, most. If he was home. Locked himself up for weeks, never went out. Ask me to give his food over the window. He use to do that when he is fed up with those insane hypocrites. Didn’t say a word. The room got smelly. I kicked the door and, there he was. Couldn’t recognize my charming brother. Death had eaten after he had delivered himself to death.
“A sangoma has his spirit. That stupid witch wants his powers he never had. And all I want is to bury him. The police say they cant arrest the sangoma with no proof.
HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT?
“What?
THAT THE SANGOMA HAS HIS SOUL?
“My pastor, the Great Prophet from Tapelo. Strong man. He has kept Ladin’s body but no one must know about this.
In A Taxi.
YOU KNOW LADIN?
“Uhm, yeah, pssst, who’s dumb enough not to know Ladin? Listen to this cute fool peto!”
“Yhuuu, kids of the other side, so tiring. No wonder Ladin doesn’t give a two flying shit about you living or dying.”
At Salon
“My bro’da, we are at a funeral’s day before, mans is preaching, coffin is on my right, his left of himself. Candles on the dead sister’s head. The candles are two. One are on the bottom of them coffin. The bra is crying chief. Preaching: the day she was taken away from us, from me, by her in-laws. She looked so beautiful. I was not older than 10. But I remember, she was wore a pink bell-bottom. She permed her hair. Remember, every man in this place wanted her for him. Now she is lying here, about 40 years on. The brother went on and on. Almost no end. His voice went up but we struggled to make sense of what he was saying. He then moved to the coffin. The coffin, mind you sir, is half-open against our view and from where I’m seated you cant see her. He takes the candles that is next to her head, he kneels and starts screaming, crying, wailing, this man. He is talking to her, but no one is successful in hearing him. He screams, his sweaty too. His very ugly also, mind you sir.”
“You are very dramatic too.”
“Sister, can I finish my story. He screams. . .”
“Can you move away from that part already?”
“This one is forward. Anyways, I grab my sit. I know when some is about to go down. She. . .you will never believe this. The preaching must’ve been so loud that she kicked her feet, everyone got up on their feet. Chair fell, thunderous. She got up on her feet. One mother died there and then, bless her spirit forever. The brother fell. Was still breathing by the time we buried him with her, he did not deserve to live his life with that shame of waking a dead one, poor brother. She said nothing. Relaxing on a freezer must of course freeze icecold your tongue. The real her was dead, but this body of her was awoken from dying.”
“And also, she passed 18 months before, car accident it is believed. No one knewed her. We look for my dear sister in faith. She was nowhere. Her brother had finally found her
“I remember the old people saying her soul would be bodyless”
“Yes. The body had to be rekilled. The body did not fight or oppose the rekilling. You see, the body is not afraid of death, any body. The mind is afraid of death. So without the brain, the body didn’t know what we are doing to it. We cut the head out and put it inbetween her feet.”
“But I don’t understand how this has anything to do with Ladin?”
“Oh that fraud! He shows up drunk, smelling from cheap alcohol. He had bitches with him. Thin, tall. Two in total. One in tears, they have no shame those meatless things. This frauds walks to the brother, who is not conscious since the sister woke. And whispers: she again dead. Your sister was with no body on death, the people cut the head, and she again died. You will be buried with her, and you will finally die. To both of you, rest well.”
“That explains everything. By the time I was arriving, no wonder no one person was speaking.”
“The rest of the night was quiet. No one wanted to wake them anymore. People had come to attend a funeral, and we owed it to them to give them a funeral. Thing is, we respect people who drop everything for a dead person.”
“That was the last death by Ladin. He was never seen again.”
“Her grandma says Ladin was spending years in his room, never going out. Never eating. He began eating himself, he was ashamed. He hated funerals and didn’t want to be buried. So he ate all of himself and drank his blood and until there was no more of him left.”
“We are a people without a bringer of death news.”
“But who cares? You are all sick with this death thing. You will all die from shame. How do you live like this way? Sies!”
Momo, in his living room
SO YOU GREW UP WITH LADIN?
“Yes.”
WHAT WAS HE LIKE?
“Many-many things. He dressed nicely. Speak soft. He like many of Cokes. Special man.
WHAT KIND OF A PERSON WAS HE?
Very quiet. Speak most with himself than with mans and womens. But nice die man.
HOW DID THE TWO OF YOU MEET?
Don’t remember.
HOW OLD WERE YOU WHEN YOU MET?
Very early in life.
HOW EARLY?
Don’t know.
WHEN LAST DID YOU SEE HIM?
asblackaspossiblecollective is a Cape Town based multi-disciplinary art collective interested in de-santifying the archive, in storytelling and myth-creation, & ending the world as we know it.